Nothing to wear

Miss Flora M'Flimsey, of Madison Square,Edwardian lady
Has made three separate journeys to Paris;
And her father assures me, each time she was there,
That she and her friend,— Mrs. HarrisÍ—
(Not the lady whose name is so famous in history,
But plain Mrs H., without romance or mystery),
Spent six consecutive weeks without stopping,
In one continuous round of shopping.
Shopping alone, and shopping together,
At all hours of the day, and in all sorts of weather;
For all manner of things that a woman can put
On the crown of her head, or the sole of her foot,
Or wrap round her shoulders, or fit round her waist,.
Or that can be sewed on, or pinned on, or laced,
Or tied on with string, or stitched with a bow,
In front or behind, above or below:
For bonnets, mantillas, capes, collars, and shawls;
Dresses for breakfast, and dinners, and balls;

Dresses to sit in, and stand in, and walk in;
Dresses to dance in, and flirt in, and talk in;
Dresses in which to do nothing at all;
Dresses for winter, spring, summer and fall;
All of them different in colour and pattern,-
Silk, muslin, and lace, crepe, velvet and satin;

Floral dressBrocade, and broadcloth and other material
Quite as expensive and much more ethereal.
In short, for all things that could ever be thought of,
Or milliner, modiste, or tradesman be bought of,
From ten thousand franc robes to twenty-sou frills;
In all quarters of Paris, and to every store,
While M'Flimsey in vain stormed scolded, and swore,
They footed the streets, and he footed the bills.
And yet though scarce three months have passed since the day.
This merchandise went, on twelve carts, up Broadway,
This same Miss M'Flimsey of Madison Square,
The last time we met, was in utter despair,
Because she had nothing whatever to wear!
Nothing to Wear!

W. A. Butler
(via Arnold T. Hindley)

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